More than a year, almost a year

Funny how the last time I blogged, it was about how I was hoping to thaw from the winter snow. Spring came, summer was barely existent, and now this fall, we've already had two snows (very unusual for October) and are bracing for the winter to come.

It's now been over a year since we left CA, probably more like 18 months. And it's approaching a year since we moved into our wonderful house. Hard to believe that I will blink and we would have been gone from CA for two years already.

Some of the last big chunks of our transitional period are finally done. Back around the time of the last post (March or so) we decided on a new church home and have been meeting people and trying to settle in to serve in the past couple of months. We joined a small group, we've helped out here and there, Tom's starting the membership process, I joined the mom's group and a women's Bible study group. Our church is just about everything we were looking for in a church, not the least of which is that it is a manageable size. From the first weeks we visited, we saw the same people and now we feel like we can really make connections. We loved our previous church (Woot! ALCF!) but we were ready to move into a different sized community and are excited to have found it.

The last major change for us that had anything to do with our move was moving to our "new" elementary school. Since we were living in an apt at the beginning of the school year last year, Tobey was at a different neighborhood school district than our house sits in now. So this year, we are making the transition of being in a new school. Again. I won't lie and say it's been going smoothly, mainly because *I* am the one reliving all sorts of social angst, being the new kid and new parent in school, thinking that everyone else already knows each other. To spare you the gory details, let's just say that God has been answering this mommy's prayers that her son can start to find decent friends at school.

One natural question, now a year or so later, is whether we like it out here, are we glad with our decision to move? I'd say a big YES. It doesn't negate the fact that we miss our good friends out in CA, especially when we go out on a day trip or find ourselves home on a Saturday evening wishing we had those old friends to just call up and hang out again. But in every other way, this move has worked out better than we could have planned. I do find myself on a fairly regular basis, driving around town before/after a school drop off/pick up, enjoying the beauty of Lexington in all four of its seasons, feeling totally blessed to be able to live here. The house has worked out beautifully, not only because it's a beautiful house in a perfect location, but because it also led us to our church which has in turn led us to new friends. We see Tom's brother almost every month and the kids are getting along better than I could have imagined -- my nieces really are almost like sisters for the boys, but without the fighting. Although it's a bummer to be the only one left out when my parents fly to CA, now that both brothers live in L.A., we are reaping the benefits of being closer to parents, from driving down for a long weekend to being able to avoid crazy holiday airport travel this December (yay for road trips!). We are close to the city but not in it, we are close to the countryside but not in it either. Besides these crazy winter heating bills, this place is totally what we wanted in this season of our lives.

I was kind of overflowing with gratitude earlier this week when I took the boys to a last minute Halloween party after school (invited by a new school acquaintance, actually). As we walked up to the Halloween party, it was like a picture out of Family Fun magazine, I kid you not. There are four (big, beautiful) houses that shared this empty grassy area between them (the only lot arrangement that I've found to be better than our cul-de-sac!). Kids were running around, parents were in Halloween costumes, there was a gorgeous, huge orange and red maple tree with the sun streaming through it from the side and the weather was perfect (given that it literally snowed the day before). Although I only knew 1 or 2 of the parents in the crowd (and Tobey and Eli probably only knew that many kids too), it was a picture perfect moment. We went in search of a neighborhood where the kids could just play on the street and here we are in a town where it exists not just on our street but in the neighborhood where this party was as well. I felt some sense of closure, a sense that what we've been looking for, we have found. Having local friends, we are still working on it, but I have faith that they will come too. But seeing that perfect sun streaming through that perfect tree in the perfect setting, made me feel like we went in search of "home" for us and our boys and maybe we've finally found it.

As for when to close out this blog, who knows? When will I truly feel local? Maybe when I run into more people who have moved here more recently than we have. (This town is full of transplants, including a lot from CA like us.) Maybe when I stop having those moments where I think, "Where am I? Did we really move from CA like we always said we would?" Maybe when we stop making jokes about us Californians and all this snow. Maybe when typical New England things (like apple picking or banging a left turn) aren't so novel to us anymore. Maybe when our friends base is built up again.

Until then...

Acclimating

It's March now. The rest of the world is smelling spring around the corner so I thought I did too. Until some native New Englanders said, it's only March, meaning snow could possibly still happen.

But we did enjoy a little bit of a springy winter, meaning it was warm enough to play outside in the snow but it hasn't been warm enough consistently for the snow to turn into gross slush.

With the talk lately for warmer weather (warmer = 40), I've been recounting to many New England friends and acquaintances here how literally, it will be 55 degrees and we, the preschool park bunch that we used to lunch with everyday, would say that it was too cold to let the kids to play outside. Most New Englanders belt out a big guffaw hearing that.

I'm proud to say our skin is a little thicker (or unfortunately, more well-insulated) now that today I let the kids run outside in 47 degree weather without a coat. Kind of reminds me of how I gasped when the boys' schools said the windchill had to go into the 20's before they declare recess indoors instead of out. Now I can understand that after a monthlong of 20 degree highs, 30's was sounding pretty darn comfy and 40's was pretty darn balmy.

This weekend is supposed to be mid-50's. Break out the shorts!

First real snow

Upon waking to 2 inches of wet snow on the ground...

My CALIFORNIA kids - "Snow! Snow! I can't wait to go out and make a snowman!"

My WASHINGTON, DC roots - "Ooo! Did they cancel school? Check the website."

My BOSTON reality - "Two inches? We don't even bother updating the website! See you at 8:30!"

How time flies

This must be a new low in blogging: blogging about topics that happened a year ago. But you know how sometimes there's special times or memories that you just don't want to forget? Holidays especially. Here are some things that I found in a blog draft (or actually a self-addressed email draft) from last Christmas. YES, THAT MEANS XMAS 2007.

Once in a while, usually while driving through our new town or while unpacking at our new house, I stop and think about what has happened in the last year. A year ago, we were still just getting the word out to our local friends that we intended to move. But nothing had really happened except for our exploratory trip to Boston. We hadn't even decided whether Boston or DC at this point last year. And here we are a year later, not just moved, but moved into our permanent home. D&D didn't believe we would do it this fast and therefore planned on a holiday without us. Sometimes I can't believe that we finally did it.

But back to 2007...

Part of what made Xmas 2007 special was time with my brother and sister-in-law. Since they've lived in Asia now for upwards of 4 or 5 years, opportunities to hang out with them are few and far between. And it's nice to hang out with them because they don't have kids and therefore, to me, are inherently more interesting to talk to. Well, and they ARE more interesting than my usual crowd of moms or engineers. They're journalists who at their very core are inquisitive and are versed in a range of topics. Okay, well, at least that describes my Pulitzer prize winning and Olympic torch bearing sister-in-law. My brother is still my brother. :-)

Xmas 2007 will remain in my memory as the Wii Christmas. No, we didn't buy or receive a Wii (and based on our addiction that vacation, we probably never should get one) but my brother actually brought his from Asia! Even Tobey and Eli were addicted -- they'd wake up in the morning and especially if it was Tom or Andrew who was up with them in the morning, within half an hour, they'd all be in the basement playing Mario's Beijing Olympics on the Wii. Tobey got the hang of javelin, fencing and bowling. He also got the hang of the hammer throw which he demonstrated with one of his stick shaped toys when we got home (!). Eli would often parrot whatever the Wii said -- nothing funnier than hearing a 2.5 year old say with an evil tone, "Maaaario!". We made Mii's of everyone and even got my dad to play golf. And were introduced to other wacky games Andrew had like bunnies that danced to the beat or trying to hide from a boss while you goofed off at work.

But by far the event that made this the Wii Christmas was the late night tennis matches between us and Andrew. Yes, that is "us" (plural) and Andrew (singular). It was clear he was the Wii veteran and us the rookies because playing tennis he was sitting in a chair just flicking his wrist while Tom and I were just short of running the length of my parents' cavernous basement reenacting real tennis. He'd easily beat us 2 against 1 playing LEFT handed as Tom and I would use our daylight Wii time obsessively trying to perfect the timing of the power serve. Just when we'd get to the point of almost beating him then he'd up his game playing right handed and when we got closer even still, then he played true doubles with our visiting cousin as his doubles partner. Night after night we'd challenge them until 2AM in the morning, laughing and yelling in the basement, breaking for Klondike bars, while the rest of the family slumbered two flights of stairs away. Finally, the night came when Tom and I actually beat Andrew and Chris and just to make sure, we played a couple more hours to make sure it wasn't a fluke. Probably after 20 matches or so, we could claim 3 as victorious.

And boy were we sore.

Other memories from Christmas a year ago: we spent Christmas with Tom's parents in Pittsburgh. The best gift they gave us was the gift of sleeping in each morning. The boys would wake up and thank goodness they'd just wander downstairs where they'd usually find Nai-Nai or Yeh-Yeh more than willing to give them breakfast. There were days we slept in until 8:45! Ahhh, I'm excited just thinking about it since in a couple weeks we're going back! We also waited with anticipation the arrival of the Christmas card from one of my friends from MIT/church in Boston. His life is insane -- 4, or is it 5?, kids, no kidding each year we get a card there's always a baby announcement in there, he works full time, he does a night program MBA or PhD...or both...and he preaches part time at his church, all while enjoying time with his dozen of children while supporting his wife who homeschools them all. We used to feel pretty lame after reading his letter until two years ago when we realized that he's not normal and life is not a competition. And now we like reading his Christmas letter to laugh at ourselves and embrace our slacker lifestyle.

The last "full circle" moment from last year's Christmas to this year's is Life. I'm not being philosophical, I mean Life, the board game. For those with the same opportunity as we do to go to your parents home and dig up old "vintage" classic stuff from your childhood, you'll understand the thrill of finding a board game that you haven't seen in 30 years and getting to play it with your own kids. Tobey's a little young (and we always played while Eli napped) but he knows enough of how to play a board game that we played it with him. It was hilarious and unexpectedly a great way to springboard conversation about, well, life! For one thing, I chose not to go to college, much to Tom's dismay. "Don't follow Mommy's example, Tobey", was Tom's fatherly advice. Turns out that we made about the same amount of salary, college educated or not, giving Tobey a lesson that there are different kinds of smart and one can make it in life even without the treasured diploma. See if I still feel the same in 13 years when Tobey announces he's skipping college to be a painter (his latest "what I wanna be when I grow up" is a painter, and I'm not talking an artist painter, I'm talking a painter of walls, like the guys who have been coming to our house everyday for two weeks leading up to Thanksgiving). Life was also a good way to introduce Tobey to money and the larger money amounts, most of which just flew over his 4 year old head. Jump ahead to 2008 and I just bought our own game of Life. I guess something about being holed up in a house on a cold day conjures up memories of wanting to play Life.

Thinking back of 2007's Christmas memories in DC and Pittsburgh really grounds me. So much has happened to us this year but I can remember all of those memories like it happened yesterday. Finally, as I look back at my list of things to blog about from a year ago, it's kind of funny to see some things not change all that much. I marked down that on 1/21 I packed my first box after weeks of procrastinating. Now I look at my big pile of boxes to UNpack and I feel like procrastinating all over again. I also wrote that I was excited to "purge" a lot of stuff as I packed, not wanting to take too much extra junk with us to our new life in Boston. Now I am still excited to purge a lot of stuff, which begs the question, just how much completely useless junk did we have if there enough for me to want to purge twice?? I have "school conundrum" jotted down, which I think back then meant whether to register Tobey for Yew Chung kindergarten not knowing if his school would return my deposit when we moved away. Now I face a different school conundrum of whether/when to tell the district we moved at the risk of them forcing Tobey to switch schools midway through the school year.

It's weird to think that things can change and yet stay the same at the same time. Our whole environment has changed and yet looking back a year, especially at Christmas time, there are some things that surprisingly and thankfully ground us and stay the same.

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

I've been unusually seasonal this year with Christmas. We just moved in 2 weeks ago and I'm most excited about decorating for Christmas! Part of it is the East Coast vibe. Even when I was growing up, I liked the colonial houses with one candle in each window -- someone here remarked that's very New England. And I love that we have a little lamp post in front, a la Narnia, because I can't wait to put a garland on it. And I never really cared to have a wreath on the front door but this year I find myself eyeballing them everywhere from Wilson Farm to Stop & Shop. And I usually don't bother with day-after-Christmas sales but this year, I can't wait to go to get some good deals on decor!

I think part of it is also the new house. As I remarked to Tom yesterday: I care about this house. I guess it feels like home, not that we are that used to living here, but it's supposed to be our home for as long as we can see. Unlike our Sunnyvale home where in the back of our minds we were still wondering whether we'd move to the East Coast. This house is big enough, new enough and perfect enough that we can't foresee needing to move for the sake of the house. So with my mind thinking more permanently, then it seems fun to decorate a house that I "care" about. Tom echoed the sentiment, not about the decorating (although he is outside in 37 degree temps with Tobey figuring out how to hang Christmas lights, but that this is a house that he cares about.

Part of it is also the Mom-to-Mom Christmas brunch talk by the women's pastor, Cynthia Fantasia. She talked about traditions and for the first time, I felt like I could actually act on making traditions in our home for the holidays. Maybe because we aren't going to move anymore. Maybe because, as far as OUR plans are concerned, this is probably "it" for the size of our family. Maybe because for the first time in five years the kids are at an age where traditions can be appreciated and done by both kids, when I'm not so frazzled by the thought of parenting much less the additional efforts of the holidays. I immediately set out to do simple gingerbread houses with the kids and ripped a bunch of our holiday CD's into iTunes. I dropped by Michael's yesterday, totally delighted that they were having a big sale on Christmas decor. It was just what I needed to get completely in the holiday mood. I even bought candles for Advent and looked up Advent devotionals we can do with the kids at night. Maybe we'll make ornaments, maybe we'll have one to commemorate each year, maybe we'll make up traditions as they come. But I feel like we can finally start to have traditions.

Last night we had what we thought a very traditional Christmas moment. We went to Lexington Center where they were having a shopping festival. We waited on the town green for Santa's arrival and there was free hot cocoa and cookies courtesy of the Selectmen (like a town council). There were carolers singing traditional Christmas carols that dared to mention the birth of Jesus. Santa arrived on a Lexington FD fire truck and handed out candy canes. Then they lit the town tree, all with progressively "green" LED lights. All in 36 degree temps. The boys had fleece lined jeans, I'm thinking maybe Tom and I need some too.

It truly is a wonderful time of the year and Eli summed it up nicely while Santa gave out candy canes. As he sat on Tom's shoulders amidst the mob hoping for a candy cane, Eli says, "I love this guy!"

Moving Day!

I think at least 10 times today already, either Tom or I have declared, "I can't believe we have this house!"

8:00AM - Dennis arrives with E&R to babysit the kids at the house

8:30AM - Oscar's Moving Company arrives

11:15AM - All loaded, drive to the house

11:30-1:15PM - Ang stands in 22 degree weather directing the flow of boxes

1:15PM - Last box moved in

2:15PM - Breakfast

3:15PM - Ang finally takes off coat after 2 hours in house

3:30PM - First box emptied

4:30PM - Kids' bedroom all set up with beds and sheets

5:00PM - Internet up and running (priorities!)

5:15PM - House starts to feel like ours, not the Y's

5:30PM - Kids in our hair, just sent them down to the basement. Man, I LOVE THIS HOUSE!

6:00PM - Tom's parents arrive from Pittsburgh

9:30PM - Kids in bed in our first night in our new home.

And who knows how long before Tom and I get to bed. It's been great to have Tom's parents here visiting. Kind of fills the house with more love. I mean, I'm going to love all the new space. But the new space is only as good as the people who fill it.

Thank you, God, for this house. An 11-month journey and we are finally home again.

Closing

We closed on our house today!

Yay! And aw... at the same time!

Yay of course because we now are homeowners again. Boy was that a long escrow period. It was pushing 60 days because we had to get a 60 day lock on our (AWESOME!) interest rate, 45 was not quite enough. And we started a week or two after our offer was accepted. It was almost like being pregnant, just waiting and waiting and waiting, but without excruciating pain at the end.

The actual signing meeting was none like I've ever been to. In CA, as buyers we signed our papers a day or two ahead of time and the actual closing day was a pretty quiet wire transfer for the money. We could do the whole transaction without ever meeting the other party. Not so in MA. We were there, our realtor was there, the sellers were there, I suppose the seller's agent would have been there...except she was our agent too, our lawyer, their lawyer. The atmosphere was upbeat. We were happy with the price, our rate and the fact that they picked us at all. I think they were pretty happy that we were a nice family moving in and with where they are moving, they get to pay off their house and pocket a nice chunk of cash. They knew their lawyer for 20 years so it was like a reunion for them. We were just excited to have the house. It was friendly chatting all around. You'd almost never know it was a business transaction except that our lawyer occasionally would say, "Keep signing..." as we made our way through our ream of papers to sign.

The closing was a little sad though because, speaking of the selling family, we started to befriend them. They were a very devoted Christian family who was friends with some of my old BCEC friends as well as best friends with my new mom's group leader. And after I met the mom face to face for the first time, we realized that their youngest and my boys were actually in the same summer program at Eli's school this past summer when we first got to Lexington. What a small world! We went to the house almost weekly with appts for contractors and each time the whole family was at home (mom homeschools, dad works from home). They made us cookies when they accepted our offer, we made them rice krispy treats when we came for our contractor appts. We gave them a going away/road trip gift, they left us an area rug and some custom made cushions for a sit in bench. They were really happy that we hoped to use the house much like they did: hosting friends, potlucks, Bible studies and the like. (The house is set up well for those types of things.) It was by far the friendliest and most congenial real estate transaction we ever had. I think we would have totally been friends, except that the circumstance that brought us together was that they were moving away! It was almost sad to say goodbye to them as they left for their new home in North Carolina. 

When the signing was over, we got the keys and said our goodbyes. Me and Tom's first instinct was to go to the house, as if something about the house had changed in the two hours we were last there for our final walkthrough?? But something did change -- our outlook -- because the house was now OURS. The house was now finally empty and it was one of the first times that we were in the house without the selling family or our realtor also there. After we did our little happy dance, thrilled that it was finally ours, we drove off to resume normal life of work and picking up the kids. But when I drove away from the house and out the usual streets on the way to Tobey's school, things definitely felt different. It wasn't just roads that made their way through Lexington, now these were roads that we were going to drive every single day, OUR street, OUR intersection, OUR landmarks to tell friends how to get there, OUR Seattle's Best coffee, OUR Mobil gas station. In one 1.5 hour signing session, my entire outlook on our house changed from "the" house, to OUR house.

So now our sights turn back to our house and the work to be done before we move in in a few weeks. Now that the "pregnancy" is over, it's time to put all of our planning into motion. First up: tomorrow, the painters come and start taking down wallpaper. Yipee!